The Best Day before Christmas

This could have been just another ordinary day, aside from the fact that the next day will be the celebration of Christ's birth. As for me, I will mark this as a momentous one, for I received one of the greatest Christmas gift from God.

Without a doubt, this is the best day before Christmas I have ever spent.

It's been a month since I heard the sweetest "yes" from my new found love. One month feels like a year with her. Others might say that it is too fast in a short period of time, but only our hearts can tell that what we have is real.

I can really feel Christmas in our hearts. Each day spent with her is Christmas. Every thought of her is Christmas. The greatest love from Jesus, and god's gift through her multiplied this joy a day before Christmas, on the day itself, and on the future years to come.

I pray that this feeling will continue. I hope to do the right things and make the right decisions to keep this new found joy. One month down, more years to follow.

I thank God that I found her. More thanks for sending her and letting me spend the day before Christmas with her. :)

Merry Christmas!

To my new found joy

I barely noticed you before
Yet the universe conspired for me to see you
You were always there
Seems to have your own world
With people already involved
Filled in every role

Then you let your presence felt
You started to show your real self
Took the time to care
Your contagious joy
Your sweet messages
The way you let the child in you play
Your signature pose in every captured moment
The smile drawing on your face
Each time I see you
But deep within
The little girl calls for help
Crying
Longing for something
Missing a gap
Trying to find an answer
Looking for a permanent reason to smile

From your troubles I wanted to rescue you
To hold your hand and stand up tall
For you not to lose hope
To keep believing in everyone
In service and in God
Most of all in yourself
Despite all that you've been through

Yesteday is a mere record
Tomorrow is just a vision
These aren't necessary
For the present you is what matters

I can't promise anything
If I can, I won't
Because promises are not needed
Just a commitment
To continue filling that missing piece
To be with you in times of loneliness
To heal you from all your pain
To guide you in service
To be whatever you need
And to love you unconditionally

I love you
My new found joy

Overflowing, Ablaze, Overjoyed... So on and so forth

The first week of November has been a roller coaster ride, at least in terms of the weather. At least three storms have passed through the country, the latest one recorded as the strongest typhoon in the world for this year. It caused great devastation. Many were saved, but many lost their lives as well. Strong winds and heavy rainfall showered the Visayan region and a lot of provinces in Luzon and Mindanao. The heavy downpour was expected to last throughout the whole week...

But the skies were cleared hours before our SFC Chapters Napico 1 and 2 held the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. 

Thank you Lord for calming the storm, and giving us the perfect weather to celebrate and join our new brothers and sisters in serving You. 

We still experienced the heavy downpour and strong winds this night ... the pouring of the Gifts of the Holy Spirit to our new brothers and sisters, and the winds similar to the first experience of the disciples on Pentecost. Tongues of fire were spread throughout each and every one's mouths, singing praises and worship to the Lord. 

We started with the opening worship led by Bro. Arjay. As we start, we immediately called unto the Holy Spirit to come upon us, most of all for our new siblings. Time to sing praises and offer Him worship once more.

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You shall be clothed with power from on high when the Holy Spirit comes to you

and you shall be my witnesses throughout the ends of the earth...

Come, Holy Spirit 

Let the Fire fall...

Spirit of the Living God

We affirm your presence here

Spirit of the Living God 

We affirm your power here

To heal us and to deliver us

To rest on us and to empower us

Spirit of God

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Raising our hands, praying in tongues, closing our eyes, may we feel the presence of the Lord and the Holy Spirit witihn us.

It was still the same upbeat talk from Kuya Marlon. He never fails to deliver such a great talk for Baptism : from his personal experiences, sharings, jokes and skits. Our new brothers and sisters had their interests caught through these. 

What struck our new brothers and sisters most is the moment when they have to admit all their mistakes in the past. For every bit of a shortcoming, failure or wrongdoing, they had to stand up and accept those. It is necessary for the full cleansing of themselves before filling them up with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. This is the time to ask God for forgiveness, which He willingly answered. Our God is a merciful God. He forgives everyone who asks for it and calls unto His name. 

After unloading their burden, it is time for the climax of the talk : the pray-over to receive the gifts prepared by God for them. Silent prayers filled the venue. 

Solemn, peaceful, light. 

Tears, calm faces, delighted hearts. 

The pray-overs ended. Candles were lighted to totally cast away all the negative emotions of guilt, unworthiness, sadness, and pain. The tongues of fire made the whole place in total brightness.

Every special event needs to be remembered. Our closing praisefest lead by Bro. Lei filled exactly what was needed. There is no place here for reservations and feelings of foolishness. We sang to the top of our lungs, shouted, raised and waved our hands, jumped, danced, fell silent, prayed, and raised our hands again - all for praising and glorifying God. The calm faces earlier had turned bright as well with smiles and laughter all around. 

We are so blessed for having this multitude of new fellow warriors in service. Their number still is overwhelming -  goes to show how God works through us and especially through them by accepting His invitation and receiving the gifts of the Holy Spirit. 

After tonight's experience, I believe that we will continue to harvest more anointed fighters ready to do His mission. We are out to win this good fight. Let us do this with Him, for Him, and by Him. 

With You Lord, we will continue to experience this overflowing, ablaze, and overjoyed emotions while serving You, fulfilling your mission and looking forward to the future where every single man and woman all over the world experiences Christ.

For all of these, we praise and thank you, Lord God. 

Random Retreat Notes

"Because there are journeys I must travel alone." 

Here are some of the things I have written/read on my second solitude retreat. Let me place it hear, for me to be reminded every once in a while. 

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Seek the good of others. 1 Cr 10:23

All are essential. 1 Cr 12:22-25

Love. 1 Cr 13:4-13

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Be clean inside. Let God be the ultimate desire. Disregard the superficial desires, things of the outside. God will bring peace. 

(Homily)

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Faith, if it does not have works, is dead. Jm 3:17

For one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, it is a sin. Jm 4:17

No longer I, but Christ in me. Gal 2:20

If we hope for what we do not see, we wait with endurance. Rm 8:25    

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Even though I am not what I want to be, I am not what I used to be. 

"Help me run the race that is before me with patience, not to run too fast and not to make things happen in my future, but to let Your will be worked out in my life."

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The creaking of the swings still gives the same sound. The landscape still has its familiar color and shape. The room still has the same peace and warmth inside. 

Far away from the noisy city, I'm reliving the same experience I had the first time I was here. 

I came here before to mend a broken heart. 

I came here again to rekindle the fire burning within me. 

The heart has been completely healed : filled with joy and peace. 

The fire keeps on burning and found itself a new reason to keep on being ablaze. 

Setting aside matters of the world, putting my priorities in place.

The first and the last. The beginning and the end. 

Discernment. 

Peace. 

Courage. 

Dreams.

Desires. 

Destination. 

Let me make the right decisions this time. 

To go after my dreams, or to look for something new. 

To accept another opportunity to serve.

Let me hear Your voice. 

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Encourage one another and build one another up. 1 Thes 5:11

Name above all names. Ph 2:9

"Let us ask for grace not to tire of asking forgiveness, because He never tires forgiving."

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. Jn 1:5

While you have the light, believe in the light, so that you may become children of the light. Jn 12:3-6

If you ask for anything of me in my name, I will do it. Jn 12:14

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you. Jn 15:27

Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. Rm 10:13

None of us lives for oneself, and no one dies for oneself. Rm 14:7

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"Help me to keep a good attitude and a cheerful heart no matter what I am facing."

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We walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Cr 5:7

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A time for everything. Ec 3:1-15

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For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor 2:10

The Lord is faithful; He will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.

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Macoy. October 14-16, 2013. 

Euneirophrenia

Morning dew on the greenfields
Golden rays over the windowsill
Shadows in dim light
Earnest wind blowing
Face buried in the pillow
Images flashing through
Floating in space
A gentle smile
Eyes wide open

Wake me up when September ends. Not the song.

Huling araw na pala ng September. Sa mga nakisabay sa awitin sa taas, pwede na kayo magsigising. 

Ako naman, magrerequest pa ng extension ng pagtulog. Isang magandang panaginip ang buwan na ito para sa akin. Kung pwede lang, wala ng gisingan 'to. Kaso, hindi. Buti na lang, para pa din akong nananaginip kahit na bukas ang aking mga mata. Maganda ang track record ko ngayong buwan. At dahil magtatapos ka na, hayaan mong alayan kita ng isang engrandeng pamamaalam. 

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Salamat sa lingguhang tawag ng isang mabuting kaibigan, patuloy ko pa ding pinag-iisipan ang isang pangmatagalang pangarap: ang maging abogado. Pangmatagalan talaga, napag-iwanan na ako ng panahon. Dalawa sa aking pinakamalapit na kaibigan noong kolehiyo magpahanggang ngayon ang nakatakdang kumuha ng Bar Exam sa darating na Oktubre. Ang isa pa sa aming mga kabarkada, ganap nang may Atty. sa pangalan. Ang ilan, patuloy pa din sa pag-aaral. Ako, eto. Nagpapakabusy daw sa trabaho. Paulit-ulit kong pinaaalalahanan ang sarili ko sa pangarap ko, kahit pa sa kasalukuyan, hindi iyon ang daang tinatahak ko. Magulo pa ang isip ko ngayon, hindi pa ako sigurado sa gusto kong gawin. Ipagpapatuloy ko ba, or hahanap na lang ako ng bagong pangarap? Malinaw sakin ang mga interes ko, subalit hindi ko pa din maharap sapagkat kailangan kong maghanapbuhay. Mga praktikal na konsiderasyon muna dapat ang unahin. 

Ang pangarap, makapaghihintay yan. 

  

Meron pa akong siyam na buwan upang magpasya. Maaring maextend ng isang taon at siyam na buwan, dalawa, lima, sampu, o dalawampu. Ayos lang, masaya naman maghintay :)

Okay, sige. Balang araw, haharapin muli kita. Pero sa ngayon, kailangan ko munang ibuhos ang oras sa ibang layuning maaaring maging pangunahing ambisyon. 

At nais ko na din iparating ang buong pusong suporta ko sa mga kaibigang haharap sa pinakamadugong pagsubok. Apat na linggo na lang ng pagtitiis. Isang malaking hakbang tungo sa ating mga hangarin. Naiintindihan ko pa din ang hirap ng pagsubok na ito. Sabi nga ng idolo nating propesor noong kolehiyo, ito ang exam na kahit bigyan sya ng isang milyon eh hindi na nya ulit kukunin pa. Nasa inyo ang aming mga panalangin, sana'y maipasa ninyo ang Bar Exam. Para sa Bayan!

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Fully-booked ang mga nagdaang Sabado ng Setyembre dahil sa CLP. Sa ngayon, ito ang isa sa mga pangunahing pinaghuhugutan ko ng inspirasyon at lakas, hindi lang sa trabaho, kundi pati na din sa araw-araw na ibinibigay Niya satin upang mabuhay. Napakasaya maglingkod, napakasarap sa pakiramdam na may nailalapit kami sa Kanya. Dahil sa mga activities sa SFC, mas madalas pa din ang pagiging positive-thinker ko. May mangyari mang hindi kanais-nais, partikular sa trabaho (medyo dumadami, pero nevermind, I have a reason to stay positive, accept my mistakes, and take full responsibility) iisipin ko na lang muli ang mga aral, panunumpa at mga susunod pa naming gagawin dito, at hindi ko na iindahin ang mga pasakit, konti na lang pala. Nakakahawa ang gaan sa pakiramdam dito. Nagiging mas maayos na din ang pakikitungo ko sa pamilya, mga kaibigan, at sa iba pa dahil dito. 

Thank you Lord for this unlimited source of happiness, inspiration and strength :)

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Yaman din lamang na nabanggit na naman ang inspiration, kakanta na lang ako. 

You're the light that shines on me

Take away my sadness

You're the reason why I still believe in loving and

When you hold meI know that deep within

Now I'm not scared to love again

Masaya pa din naman pala kumanta at magsulat. Magtanong at maghintay. Manahimik subalit nakangiti, sapagkat nakakagaan sa loob. 

Oh boy, my favorite! :) 

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Muli, maraming salamat, Setyembre. 

Gising na ako. Gising na gising. Subalit nanaginip pa din. Isang magandang panaginip. Panaginip sa totoong mundo.

Because right now, reality is definitely better than dreams. 

Recycled Post. Di makamove-on eh :D

Dahil wala akong maisip na bagong ideya para gawan ng post, nagbalik ako sa mga naisulat ko na dati. Nakakita ako ng linya na nagustuhan kong gawan ng panibagong pagsasalaysay.

Quoting myself from last year, iPlant CLP Talk 1 :

"I admit that at a certain point in my life, I have experienced both love and loneliness. But after I have seen that light once more, I will no longer doubt the absence of love. I may be alone sometimes, I may lost another love one, I may be rejected and be hurt once again, but this time, I won't question the existence of God and the love He has given us. His Love gives me the will to accept anything. I'm holding on to this Love, and make this my guiding light."

Sa ngayon, napatunayan kong nanatili pa din ang sinabi ko noong nagsisimula pa lang ako sa CLP. Natagpuan ko na ang liwanag. Nakabalik na ako dito. Maaaring magdilim muli, masasaktan, mawawalan, at maging malungkot sa ilang pangyayari. Natural lang naman na bahagi 'to ng mga dinaranas ng tao. Cycle nga daw, hindi palaging nasa taas, minsan nasa baba. Ibuhos man lahat ng ito, naniniwala akong hindi na ako matitinag, sapagkat may nagmamahal sakin.

Sa nakalipas na isang taon, makailang-ulit din akong nakaranas ng sakit. Makailang ulit din ako sinubok. May mga pagkakataong natalo ako, pero hindi ko na masyado ininda ang pagkagapi. Ipinagpapasalamat ko na lang ang mga iyon. Nakakatuwa at kakaiba, pero totoong hindi na nga ganun kabigat ang epekto sakin ng mga iyon simula ng maging active ako sa SFC. Mas naging magaan ang lahat, mas madaling tumanggap ng mga ganoong pangyayari at damdamin. Matibay na ata ang aking kinakapitan, at hindi Sya bumibitiw. Uulitin ko ang pinanghawakan ko, I'm holding on to this love, and will make this my guiding light.

Patuloy pa din akong ginagabayan ng liwanag.

Thank you, Lord.

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Liwanag

Nakatagpo muli ako ng isang bagong liwanag sa paglalakbay. The Lord is so generous for sharing this light to us. Maayos na ang daloy, hindi ko naisip na may mas magbibigay-kulay pa pala. Salamat sa liwanag na nagdudulot ng saya sa lahat; sa liwanag na gumuguhit ng ngiti sa mga labi ng makakasilay dito; sa liwanag na nagdadala ng bahaghari sa kalangitan. You don't know how much difference you have made to someone else's life for simply being yourself and just being there. Just let your light shine on and continue to be a blessing and inspiration to others.

Thank you, dear light.

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